God had a different plan for me
Jen Swint- Our adoption journey:
Wow….I don’t even know where to begin. I will start by saying that everything I thought about meeting my soulmate and starting a family was completely wrong. I had envisioned being married by 30. I was wrong. I wanted to marry a dark haired, dark eyed, corporate business man. I was wrong. I wanted to have children thru conception by my mid thirties. Wrong again. It’s amazing that we as humans can slip into the mindset that we are in control. I was reminded multiple times that I was not.
I met my husband at 35. He was a red-head with blue eyes and had absolutely nothing to do with business, much less corporate America. Lastly, at 38, I still had not gotten pregnant and after two different infertility specialists testing each of us, we were not going to get pregnant on our own.
I was miserable at work and frustrated that I couldn’t get pregnant. My husband had picked up an adoption consulting firm brochure at one of the infertility specialist offices. We had a discussion that night about adoption and agreed that both of us were open to it. I, however, was “too busy at work” to research adoption. Every time I started to, it was so very overwhelming! I had no idea what the terms domestic, international, home study, open or closed adoption meant and I didn’t make the time to figure it all out.
We made it to the medical recommendation that we do IVF. We were sent in to meet with a patient counselor and basically told to read a big fat packet of information before my next ovulation in a week. The week came and went and another packet arrived in the mail. With a bill for just under $20,000! We were so taken aback and decided that IVF wasn’t for us and we wanted to move forward with adoption. I was still “too busy at work” to dive into the overwhelming adoption research.
Luckily I reached out to a high school friend who had adopted and was a strong Christian woman. She responded immediately and became a part of our journey. We had three signs from God in a week’s time all pointing at the same adoption consultant. We decided to hear Him and make an appointment. The day we met with the consultant, we decided that is where God was calling us and agreed with work with them. Moment’s later, I lost my job.
It was devastating as I had never lost a job in my career and we had just made a big financial commitment. We were both stressed but agreed to surrender our worries to God. I decided to take 3 months off and we dove head first into the home study process. Two weeks later we were approved and three months later, matched with a birth mom! So thankful that God had led us to our baby, we were on cloud 9. Until we got the call. Wrong again. The birth mom changed her mind and decided to parent her son. We were devastated but knew this was a risk with adoption. We lost money, time and emotions. But we picked ourselves up and jumped back in head first. We knew God had our baby and He would bring us to our child in His time. Just like he had brought my husband and I together randomly at a wedding…..in His time, His way.
The process had ups and downs. Stress, worry, excitement, discouragement, anger, sadness, happiness….you name it, we experienced it! It was also hard because none of our immediate friends or family had adopted or been through the process. We were the first. But God’s timing always prevails and He delivers when we trust! A few months later, we were matched again and this time, with only two weeks notice! Our son was born and we were blessed to be in the
birthing suite with our birth parents and watch our son come into the world and take his first breath! It was such a miracle and the emotions were multiplied by the thousands.
The day we became parents is a day I will NEVER forget! The journey was so very colorful and worth every single emotion felt and dollar spent! We do not come from money, nor do we have a money tree in our backyard today…..but God provided every single step of the way! He also paved the path in our hearts to adopt again and we now have a beautiful son and daughter! We are SO blessed and appreciative all of our people who supported us along the way. God’s plan was by far the BEST plan and I know could not have imagined starting and growing my family any other way!